Jump to content

  • Articles Directory

    • Chicago Public Schools launched its Office of Student Protections and Title IX in response to recent reports of abuse and assault
      As many of us were finalizing plans for the 4th of July holiday, CPS announced the launch of a new Office of Student Protections and Title IX. This comes on the heels of its "Plan of Action" for sexual abuse and assault (read our original post here) which, presumably, was launched in response to the Chicago Tribune's early-June investigative story on sexual abuse and assault.
      According to an official press release quoting CPS CEO Janice Jackson (pictured), the newly established Office of Student Protections and Title IX will serve as a catch-all for addressing any and all abuse-related issues or discussions taking place on CPS campuses. There will be six key areas of focus:
      • Investigations
      • Advocacy
      • Compliance
      • Training and awareness
      • Policy and prevention
      • Data and reporting
      Here's the detailed explanation of what these areas cover.
      As Jackson states in this related video, one step already in progress is the re-checking of backgrounds for any and all adults who work with CPS in any capacity.
      What are your thoughts? Join our ongoing discussion on the Forum.
      Read more...
    • If back-to-school transitions are tough for your child, try thees tips for a smoother start to the school year.
      The transition from summer to the new school year can be difficult for any child. It definitely is for my 8-year-old special-needs child, Lia, so my husband and I have tried a lot of techniques and have found some things that work. We’ve also come across some great ideas from other parents. Keep in mind that not all of these suggestions or ideas will work for you, but it’s worth a try for kiddos that struggle getting back into the school routine every year.
      Keep it low-key – If you are planning to take some time off before school starts, do some low-key activities rather than high energy, wild vacations. This could ease the child’s transition.
      -Physicals and immunizations – Doctors’ offices get very busy at this time of the year, so schedule visits early.
      -Supplies and school clothes – Don’t wait until the last minute to shop! Having spent many years in retail I know firsthand that back to school shopping is one of the busiest and most profitable for retailers. There are some great sales right now! Having said that Lia HATES shopping! I suggest having a well thought out list handy with all your back-to-school needs. When you are on your way to work, on your lunch hour or on your way to the gym, stop quickly to pick up those needed items right then and there!
      -Picture schedules – Create a picture schedule of daily routines. This will let your kid know what to expect throughout the day. Include dressing, grooming, eating, bus rides, school, teacher and aide pictures. If you have therapy after school or you have to pick up your kiddo early, make sure you include this in the picture schedule as well.
      -Dressing routine – Label five stacking bins Monday through Friday with an outfit for each day. Let your child pick the outfits if able. This will give her a sense of involvement and ownership.
      -Bed time – Ease your kiddos into their school bedtime schedules. It’s not easy! Limit screen time at least an hour before retiring for the evening. Take long baths to relax (Epsom salts, lavender oils, favorite tub toys, etc.). If your kids have been going to bed late all summer then start their bedtime transition about a week before school starts by moving up their bedtime routine anywhere from 10 to 15 mins earlier each night and wake them 10 to 15 mins earlier each morning. 
      -School bus - Make sure you know the bus company's name, phone, route number and pick-up time! Once you get the confirmation card in the mail call the bus company to confirm this information a couple of days before school starts. Times may change and you may not be updated. This has been known to happen!
      -Teacher and aides - Get to know the staff in your child’s class as well as the office. Make sure you have the teacher's email address and phone number. Be sure to let them know what type of summer you have had and the current situation with transition, tantrums, therapies, or anything you are currently working on (life skills, behavior modifications, etc.). 
      Lastly, I always suggest getting involved in the school. Join the LSC or “friends of….” committee to get to know other parents/teachers and principals. You want to get to know as many people as possible in case you come across any concerns or issues. This also creates a network of support for you child.
      Remember to maintain a positive attitude about summer ending and school beginning. Let your child know the new school year will lead to seeing old friends and hopefully making new ones.  
      Here’s to a wonderful and successful school year!
      Read more...
    • Whether your child is starting school for the first time or is just one of those kids who struggles with new routines, here are some suggestions for how to make the back-to-school transition smoother.
      As a kid, I loved buying supplies for the new school year, picking out my outfit for the first day and wondering what my new teacher would be like. Not all children feel the same way as I did (including my own) and many start feeling worried about the transition. Whether your child is starting school for the first time or is just one of those kids who struggles with new routines, here are some suggestions for how to make the back-to-school transition go a little more smoothly.
      Talk about it. Bring up a conversation about starting school and hear their concerns. As parents, we often want to fix the problem for them so we can make them feel better (and ourselves, too). But kids sometimes just want to know someone is listening to what they have to say. If they are having a hard time opening up, remark about an observation you have made to get them to talk (“I noticed that you keep changing the subject when we mention school. Is there anything you want to talk about?”). Or, ask them a question that might get to the cause of what is bothering them, such as worries about who they will sit with at lunch, or concerns as to what their teacher might be like. Lastly, let them know it is OK to feel a mixture of feelings such as being excited, nervous, curious, scared, etc., about starting school. It’s a way to validate that what they are going through is normal.
      Plan a visit. For my son, we did a lot of drive-bys of the school so the building became a familiar sight. Depending on the grade level, this could also mean going to the school playground to become acquainted (or reacquainted) and learn what door they will be entering the building. For students entering middle or high school, most schools have a new student orientation. If they don’t, considering asking the principal/counselor to see if you can get a tour of the building beforehand.
      Read about it. If your child is going to preschool or kindergarten, reading a book about school anxiety is a great way to help manage their fears. Some of our family’s favorites are The Kissing Hand, I Am Too Absolutely Small for School, and It’s Hard to Be Five. For older elementary school kids, other books about general anxiety such as Wilma Jean the Worry Machine or What to Do When You Worry Too Much: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Anxiety could be helpful.
      Plan for it. For younger kids going full-day for the first time, having a photo in their backpack of your family could ease the transition (just knowing it was there was helpful for my son). For older kids, help them find ways to get together with those friends they didn’t get to see over summer break, so they are excited about starting the new school year together. If you know your child has a difficult time with transitions, send the teacher an email a few days before school starts to let her know.
      Despite its challenges, I love this stressful, fun, playful age. I hope these techniques will help bring you a little more joy through the meltdown phase. They do say it’s a phase, right?
      Julie Safranski, MSW, LCSW has a background as a school social worker and is a licensed therapist who enjoys working with children, adolescents and their families. She lives in Albany Park with her husband and son.
      This article previously appeared in the NPN member newsletter, Parent to Parent. Learn about other member benefits.
      Read more...
    • Here are 3 steps you can take right now to bully-proof your child with positive emotional skills.
      As parents, we want our children to be happy. We want them to have friends. We want them to feel part of the group. The last thing we want is for our children to feel like they are on the outside looking in or, worse yet, being the victim of a bully.
      Why are some children the target of negative attention in the form of bullying or exclusion from peers, while others seem to escape this experience? After working with hundreds of families, I’ve observed that on some level, children who suffer negative attention feel unworthy and lack self-acceptance. Essentially, they feel like a victim.
      Feeling like a victim is feeling powerless. It’s holding a belief that life is happening to you, rather than something you can have an active role in shaping.
      What does this have to do with bullying? In the case of bullying, if your child feels powerless in her life, she is more susceptible to having this experience. 
      This is not to say that the victim is responsible, or that the bullying behavior is condoned because someone is projecting a “victim” quality. The person who bullies is in every way fully responsible for their actions. But people who carry around victim energy are more likely to be the target of negative attention.  
       
      The sad thing is that children who project this victim energy often don't realize what they are doing and, without this awareness, they are powerless to change. Feeling like a victim is a learned response to life's circumstances. The good news is that this habitual, learned response can be unlearned by practicing some new emotional skills.  
      Here are 3 steps you can take right now to bully-proof your child with positive emotional skills:
      Stop speaking like a victim. Saying things like "she made me feel sad" or "he's making me mad" is "victim-speak." It gives all of the power to the other person. No one can "make" us feel a certain way unless we give them permission to do so. If you catch your child (or yourself) speaking like this, turn the statement around. Instead of "he's making me mad," encourage your child to say "I feel mad" or "I choose to feel mad in this situation." This shift in speech is subtle, but it puts ownership for your child's feelings with him. Practicing this more empowering way of speaking will, over time, give your child a feeling of power over his situation. “As within, so without.”  Know that a higher power is always there to help. It doesn't matter what this higher power is to your family, but just the knowledge that there is something greater than us can give your child a great deal of confidence in his ability to stand strong in the face of challenges. If he feels he will always be okay, that energy will emanate from him. Bullies don't want to struggle. If they feel this strong, powerful energy coming from your child (and they will feel it!), they will move on to someone else.  Find things to feel good about, and think about them often.There is always something to feel good about, if you think about it. The more you look for what is good in your life, the more you get into the "feelings" that these good thoughts evoke, and then the more good you will draw to you. When your child learns to shift her thoughts from things she fears to things she feels grateful for, everything around her will change for the better. Your child can learn simple ways to take control of her thoughts and emotions, and when she does, her confidence will skyrocket and her tendency toward thinking like a victim will diminish. You can download Jill’s audio training, “7 Secrets to Building a Foundation of Confidence and Self-Esteem in Kids," FREE for a limited time here: http://bullyproofstrategies.com/.
      Jill Hope is writer, family empowerment coach, speaker, and founder of I Shine. Her programs support parents to build inner confidence, self-esteem, and resilience in their kids, while spreading the message about the power we have to create lives of fulfillment, shine our inner light, and live according to our unique purpose. In addition, Jill certifies and licenses facilitators to teach her I Shine Inner Wellness Curriculum, a social/emotional wellness program, to kids aged 9-12. She is also thrilled to be working on her forthcoming book, The Powerful Girl Within, which will be released soon.
      Read more...
    • After 18 months of having a nanny, this Chicago mom put her son in daycare. Here's why that child care decision was right for her family.
      Truth be told, I’m the last person who wanted to put her child in daycare. When my son was born, we had a full-time nanny. When he was 18 months old, we found ourselves needing a new child care arrangement, and my husband suggested daycare so our son would have more socialization and learning activities.
      I started researching daycares (on NPN’s forum, of course), and we chose a referral. My son’s first few weeks in daycare were a transition—more for me than him—but he quickly became comfortable in his new classroom. Some days, he didn’t even want to go home.
      As months went by, I noticed daycare was having a positive effect on him—and us. Here are seven ways daycare has changed our lives for the better.
      [Related: What to look for in a childcare center or daycare]
      Socialization
      My son didn’t have a sibling when he started, so daycare has been an opportunity for him to experience socialization and concepts such as sharing and being respectful.
      Routine
      Daycare has given him structure. He’s learning how to stick to a daily routine and follow along with others. And though I find it hard to believe, his teachers say he’s the best napper in his class!
      Learning
      Soon after he started, I was amazed to hear my son mentioning words and concepts I knew I didn’t teach him—I realized just how much he was learning at daycare. Throughout the years, his teachers have also been instrumental in helping us understand how he learns best.
      Manners and habits
      I was pleasantly surprised one day when my toddler shook my hand and said, “How do you do?” He’s also learned good habits such as clearing the dinner table and looking both ways before crossing the street (which of course has a fun song to go along with it).
      Potty training
      A friend once told me the best benefit of daycare was potty training. Boy, was she right. After struggling at home for months, my son’s teachers potty-trained him in a matter of weeks. Being in an environment with peers who were also potty training made the transition much easier for him.
      Friendships
      It’s been a joy watching my son develop friendships with his classmates, and I too enjoy the camaraderie with parents. When one of his classmates transfers to a new school, I don’t know who takes it harder, him or me!
      And now the best for last: babysitters
      I know daycares have different policies but ours allows teachers to babysit, which has been a godsend for us. What can be better than a babysitter you know and trust and your child looks forward to spending time with?
      Now that my son is nearing kindergarten, I‘ve been thinking about all his kind and loving teachers, the classmates that cheerfully greet me each morning (Hi, CJ’s mommy!) and the daily routine I’ve grown to look forward to. Knowing this is his last year there makes me a little sad. Daycare was definitely the right decision for us.
      Weighing your childcare options? Look for a parent-recommended nanny in NPN's Childcare Classifieds and browse our School & Daycare Directory.
      Read more...
    • Want a family vacation without the stress of plane travel? Try these Midwest vacation spots in Illinois, Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota and Indiana.
      You know the saying “Midwest is best?” Well, if you ask me, the Midwest truly shines in the summer months…the glistening lakes, wealth of greenery, and tons of unique places to relax and unwind. It’s a complete 180 from the harsh winter months that we suffer through.   That’s why we always plan a Midwestern summer family vacation. We can avoid the drama and expenses involved with an airline flight, support local businesses and keep our money in the hardworking Midwest. And, I’m not going to lie….it is VERY hard to resist Tim Allen and his “Pure Michigan” commercials.   Are you looking for some great family-friendly vacation spots in the Midwest? Then look no further than this list:   Coloma, Michigan: This small town is nestled between St. Joseph and South Haven so you can explore the benefits of both areas when staying in Coloma. Typically we would spend our vacation beach and park hopping since there are so many to choose from, enjoying bonfires and spiced up s’mores every chance we get. Highlights include berry picking, old fashioned carousels, wineries and Silver Lake beach.  Driving time: 2–3 hours   Long Beach, Indiana: Splashing around on the shores of Long Beach truly makes Lake Michigan feel like an ocean. And when you are sick of swimming, explore the gorgeous sand dunes throughout the area. We especially love taking a trip to Long Beach because it is so close that we can make a day trip out of it. We recommend going on a Saturday since Sunday traffic can be pretty brutal.
      Driving time: 1–1.5 hours   North Shore, Minnesota: Although this is the farthest destination on the list, one could argue that it is the most fabulous. Why? Two words: whale watching. Yep, you and your family can partake in whale watching on the north shore of Lake Superior. There are tons of lodges and resorts to choose from, and other highlights include hiking, waterfalls, state parks…the options are endless.
      Driving time: 7–8 hours   Sheboygan, Wisconsin: Ever notice the Sheboygan shout-out in Home Alone? It was probably because  of its wide array of family-friendly activities like interactive water fountains, children’s museums, and a gorgeous lighthouse pier, in addition to the popular Blue Harbor Resort. Even if you are renting a house in Sheboygan, be sure to get a day pass for the indoor waterpark at Blue Harbor-you won’t be disappointed! Also, don’t miss out on taking a short drive to the American Club and dining at either the Horse and Plow (casual, great food for all ages) or getting some ice cream from their beautiful garden ice cream fountain. Interested in larger waterparks? Then simply drive a little further to the top resorts in the Dells.
      Driving time: 2.5–3 hours   Starved Rock, Illinois: There is no question as to why Starved Rock is the top attraction in Illinois. It is absolutely BEAUTIFUL. Set up camp or rent your own cabin while exploring all the Starved Rock has to offer: fishing, hiking, swimming, horseback riding, bird watching, small town shopping and local wineries…what more can you ask for? Driving time: 2 hours   I do understand if palm trees are calling your name, and if that is the case, here are some great tropical locales for Chicagoland families, as well as some tips for navigating your way through Chicagoland’s airports.
       
      Read more...
    • Students with disabilities in private schools are not entitled to an IEP but there are a few options available.
      As special education attorneys, we frequently receive calls from parents who want to know whether their children with special needs are entitled to any services or accommodations at private schools. Unlike students in public schools, students with disabilities in private schools are generally not entitled to an IEP under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), however, there are a few options available that parents may want to explore.  
      Individual Service Plans: The IDEA does establish a “proportionate share” arrangement between school districts and private schools. This means that public school districts must utilize a certain share of their funding for children attending private schools within the district’s boundaries. Through the proportionate share arrangement, private schools and the local districts conduct annual meetings and discussions regarding what types of special education and/or related services they will provide. The local school district will then draft an “individual service plan” or “ISP” for the child. An ISP is less detailed than an IEP, but will document the types of service provided, as well as the location and frequency of the service. 
      To find out what type of service a school district will be providing to a private school student, a parent should contact the district administrative office of the school district in which the private school is located. If your child is not yet eligible for special education, the district in which the private school is located is also responsible for conducting the initial case study evaluation for potential eligibility.
      Part-Time Attendance: In Illinois, we have a unique section of our School Code, 105 ILCS 5/14-6.01, which allows students with disabilities in private schools to also enroll part-time in their local school district of residence to receive special education services. A request for part-time attendance must be submitted by a parent to the school district where the child resides. 
      If a parent chooses part-time attendance, the resident district of the student is responsible for all evaluations and IEP services. However, the actual IEP services depend on the amount of time the student attends the public school and is generally determined by the public school, in conjunction with the IEP team. For example, if the child needs a specialized reading class for a learning disability, the public school has the discretion to determine what class the child will attend. The public school is not required to create special classes or services to accommodate the part-time attendance schedule.  
      Section 504/ADA Accommodations/Services: Children with disabilities in private schools are entitled to receive reasonable accommodations/ modifications through Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973, if the school receives federal funding, and under the Americans with Disabilities Amendments Act (ADA) even if the school receives no federal funding. While many private schools may also offer special services for children with disabilities, to attract new families and keep families together, they are not required to provide actual services under Section 504 or the ADA, just accommodations/modifications. Some private schools will create an “accommodations plan” for the child to document the accommodations, however they are not required to do so. 
      Lara Cleary and Jennifer Hansen are partners with the law firm of Hansen & Cleary, LLC, a boutique law practice focusing on the representation of children and families, individuals with disabilities, medical and mental health practitioners, private schools, and other non-profit agencies in Chicagoland and throughout Illinois. 
      Read more...
    • Great activity suggestions for when you and your kids are stuck inside during the cold winter months.
      It’s that time of year: shortened days of sunlight, exhaustion from all the holidays and we’re stuck inside with little ones, ready to pull our hair out. How could anyone survive this, let alone enjoy it? Yes, these are tough days, but with a few helpful hints, we are going to have fun! It may just be changing up the same old routine with a few new and different things. Enjoy the time together and know spring will eventually return.
      Turn on the tunes
      I always put on music, as it changes the atmosphere and lifts the energy of the house. You don’t have to choose children’s music, either. Select something you like, perhaps the Beatles or Coldplay, and alternate. Declare a “dance party” and turn the volume up.
      Shed some light
      Next, I turn on all the lights and lamps. Light has been proven to lift our spirits, especially when we are missing hours of natural daylight that we had during the summer. When eating lunch, I light pillar candles and the children are fascinated by the dancing flame—same at dinner time.
      Plan a picnic
      Speaking of meals, I toss a blanket on the floor and we have a picnic inside. Then, when that meal is done, I use the same blanket (if there aren’t too many food spills) for a makeshift fort over the dining room table. Of course, you can put chairs together or other pieces of furniture, but I like draping a blanket over one end of the table to create a three-sided enclosed space. Toss in some pillows, flashlights, books, or whatever else you like.
      Get creative
      If your children are not napping, consider doing some table work, like “snow play.” Buy a box of instant potato flakes. Pour the box into a 9x13 cake pan or any container, and let them pretend it’s snow. Give them some measuring spoons, use sand toys from the summer, and if you add some water, the flakes get starchy and you can form little snowballs. Same with water, for “water play”: Pour warm water in a dish and give the kids spoons and small cups. Just remember to put a towel under the dish to catch splashing water.
      Raid the pantry
      Make some graham cracker “houses.” Yes, get out those stale graham crackers that no one wanted for a snack, dig up some store-bought frosting and sprinkles, and let the kids decorate the fronts of the crackers. Use frosting “cement” to stick crackers together, repeating until you’ve formed a cube.
      …and more!
      Other activities include browsing through photo albums or pictures and reliving the memories. Balloons make a great chasing game if you blow them up, and let them go. They dart, fly, and go in all different directions. Instead of designated screen time for one or two shows, consider combining it for a movie that day, especially if you have family videos you can watch.
      Laurie Empen created and leads Ms. Laurie’s Play Group in Lincoln Square. She earned a master’s degree in Child Development from Erikson Institute and continues to care for children and consult with families on issues of discipline, potty training, sensory concerns and more.
      Read more...
    • What's an IEP? And how is it different from a 504? Get answers and get expert help navigating CPS's special education system.
      As Chicago parents, we have many, many questions about our children’s education.   These questions start before our little ones are even born: Should I send my child to CPS, look at private schools, or move to the suburbs? What is my local school? Is it “good”?   Parents of diverse learners face many more questions as their children grow: How will my child get her needs met once she is in school? Is CPS up to the challenge? How do I start the process of enlisting school support?    More questions arise once your child is in school. You may start to hear teacher concerns or have your own concerns about reading, behavioral difficulties, attention, etc. Some of these questions may be: Can my child’s needs be met in her current classroom? Will he have to leave his friends and teacher? Will she be labeled or seen as “different”? Will he qualify for special-education support?    In my years as a school social worker and a diverse-learner clinical staff member, I have seen how daunting these questions can be for parents. Here are some key points to help you through the process of engaging support for your diverse learner:   IEP (Individual Education Plans) and 504 plans are different. An IEP is a plan based upon an educational diagnosis that is determined due to a school-based educational need. A 504 is a medical plan based upon a student’s medical diagnosis. An IEP carries with it support from a special education teacher or speech pathologist; a 504 does not.   But they do look a lot alike. Students on a 504 can receive educational accommodations and modifications, such as extended time on tests. Conversely, students can have medical accommodations provided through an IEP.    CPS schools are not inherently “bad” places for special education. As in suburban schools, CPS schools have uninspired, bitter teachers who are waiting to retire, and they also have knowledgeable, passionate, miracle-worker teachers who make significant gains with diverse learners. Teachers and members of clinical staff do what they do for the kids.   Don’t be afraid to raise your voice. I am a social worker, not a speech therapist or school psychologist. After more than a decade on the job, I am not ashamed to say that I do not fully understand every clinical assessment of every child. As clinicians present their evaluations, please feel free to stop us to ask questions. If you disagree with our findings, let us know. Determining eligibility for support is a collaborative process. We want to make sure that we have all of the facts before making this important decision.    Know where to park your squeaky wheel. Are you having an issue with your child’s special education placement? Were you told that your child would require a paraprofessional, yet this position has not been approved at your school? Ask school staff (typically the school counselor) for the name of the person who is in charge of these decisions. If that person does not call you back, contact their supervisor. Some overarching decisions do not come from your local school. You will increase your odds of getting action when you reach out to those in charge rather than rely upon school staff. Parents wield much more power than they know.   Your child is your child, not anyone else’s. If you tell other parents, family members, neighbors, etc., about your child and her needs, you will find that everyone has a story about a diverse learner and the school support that the child has or has not received. Please know that this experience is not your experience or that of your child. Try to start from a place of trust, believing that your child’s school support team will do all that they can for your child.    Please remember that you are not in this alone. You are your child’s life-long advocate, but you are also a member of his or her school support team. Your questions, thoughts, feelings and hopes for your child are important for the school team to know and take into account.
      Read more...
    • It's your job to model healthy eating, it's their job to choose what to eat.
      It never ceases to amaze me how my two kids—born from the same womb—can be so different. I don't know why it still surprises me so much, but it always does. In areas where one excels, the other struggles. At times when one is calm, the other is fired up.  
      The differences in their personalities show up everywhere, including at the dinner table. One loves chocolate, the other loves vanilla. One is adventurous and willing to try new foods, the other is ... not. 
      Over the holiday break, we visited my mom and dad in Florida. One night, we went to a local restaurant called Deep Lagoon Seafood. Jack, my adventurous one, saw a poster on the wall promoting a local "delicacy" on the menu. The poster said:
      "Gator Bites. Bite them before they bite you."
      Um, ick.
      But, right away, Jack was practically bursting with excitement. (Kinda weird, right?) I mean, the kid was ALL IN. 
      Meanwhile, Caitlin (my not-so-adventurous one) broke out in a cold sweat. She was ready to do a mad dash from the restaurant. Can't say I blame her. My stomach did a few somersaults, too. 
      For me, it was a great reminder of the fear kids can feel when faced with an unfamiliar food. I'm a full-grown, 40-something adult and I was feeling the fear loud and clear. If someone tried to force me to eat 'gator, I would not be happy. Not one little bit. 
      As parents, it's human nature to want to encourage our kids to try new foods. After all, we know that foods like peas and broccoli are harmless and (sorta) tasty. But from a 2-year-old's perspective, those green veggies can set off the panic button, much like the 'gator bites did to me.
      So, as a parent, how can we respect our kid's food preferences and aversions, while still encouraging them to eat healthy, new foods?
      First, we can try to be good role models and eat the foods we want our kids to eat. In the 'gator example, I maybe wasn't the best at modeling adventurous food choices, but I also can't exactly say that 'gator is a food I want my kids to like. On the other hand, give me a fresh, simple salad and I'll role model my way to Timbuktu.
      Second, as the wise Ellyn Satter recommends in her "division of responsibility" approach, it's the parent's job to offer kids healthy options; it's the kid’s job to choose whether or not to eat them. In other words, we should routinely prepare healthy foods for our kids, then leave it at that. Our work is done. Amen and hallelujah.  
      As I often tell my kids when they get all hot and bothered about the choices I've given them, "Food is food. You can eat it or not. It's your choice. But food isn't something to get worked up about." Then we move on.
      Sounds like a ridiculously simple way to deal with a tantrum at the table, doesn't it? But once you get the hang of it—and your kid realizes that you aren't going to force a food—so many stresses at the dinner table melt away.
      So what was Jack's verdict about the 'gator? "Tastes like chicken, but chewier."
      P.S. I don’t know if eating ‘gator is humane, sustainable or acceptable. I should probably look into that. Keep in mind this was a one-time experience, not an overall lifestyle choice, so please be kind.
      Read more...
    • Help your kids develop a sense of gratitude and giving this holiday season with these tips.
      We all know how much kids like to receive. You only have to mention Santa, the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy to understand how true that is. So how can we teach our children to appreciate that the holiday season is primarily about giving, not getting, and to understand how lucky they are?
      Start early. Although giving and gratitude are hard concepts for really little ones to grasp, it’s never too early to start building a culture that embraces them. I’ve heard that by the age of 4 habits for life have already been formed. So as well as teaching your kids that they should brush their teeth twice a day, you could also use this time to establish positive behaviors around generosity and thankfulness.
      Use their language. While some of the language around this subject may be too sophisticated for the smallest members of the family, using words they can relate to helps encourage familiarity early on. Taking advantage of the wealth of children’s books on this subject can help. Favorites in our family include Ordinary Mary’s Extraordinary Deed by Emily Pearson, Thankful by Eileen Spinelli and Have You Filled a Bucket Today by Carol McCloud. There really is something to suit all ages.
      Involve them. You can also introduce youngsters to philanthropy at a tender age, involving them in donation drives at school, daycare, community center, or wherever your family is connected. It’s obviously more meaningful to have your children select something to donate for themselves, although it can be hard for them to give away something of their own (even a toy they no longer play with). But if you’re out shopping for something for them, try having them pick out something for someone who has less than they have. Or start with a less emotive food drive and turn a mundane grocery run into something more like a treasure hunt.
      Utilize tools. Another way to bring in the concept of charitable giving is to use a philanthropy piggy bank. We have a charming one that has a larger mama pig for saving and a smaller, nestling piglet for giving. It’s easy then to suggest birthday money is divided up between them. Finding a charity that your youngsters feel some affinity toward (a school initiative or an animal charity, for example) can help make this idea easier to relate to. Then let them know how proud you are of them for doing this. It is said that children are more highly motivated by feelings of self-worth than tangible rewards.
      Harness creativity. Of course, the physical act of giving something can be an enjoyable project in itself. Labeling gift tags can be good writing practice, while glitterizing or bedazzling a package is what kids truly do best. Setting up a creativity station and putting on some holiday music can make this a fun afternoon activity for the whole family.
      Play mail carrier. Finally, have your kids deliver gifts with you. Recipients will be touched seeing a child hand over a present, and that joy is something your kids will get to witness first-hand. Making a connection between giving and joy is a powerful tool. Giving can be pleasurable for a child too, it just takes a little effort.
      Read more...
    • Recipes and tips for making your child's school lunch
      As parents, we are sometimes just as excited as our kids when school is out for summer. For us, that means no helping with homework, no rushing around in the morning, and no packing of lunches. But as the summer nears the end, we realize the tasks ahead of us as the school year begins. Packing lunches does not need to be one of those dreaded tasks. Here are some helpful tips for putting together a delicious lunch in advance:
      No “surprise” lunches
      Try out new recipes on your kids at home first, rather than surprising them with a new lunch. As a food blogger, I do this all the time.
      Use Sunday to prep
      When I find something they like, I’ll make that dish on a Sunday night. I make enough so I can pack individual lunches for a few days during the week. My kids’ lunch favorites are Banana Muffins, Hidden Zucchini Muffins, Bourbon Chicken and Crispy Corn Flake Chicken (see below for recipe). Also on Sundays, my boys and I will bake S’mores Brownies. Then we’ll wrap them individually so they’re ready for the lunch box for dessert throughout the week.
      Eat in season
      My go-to fruit is the small individual bag of organic apple slices from Costco or Trader Joe’s. Of course, a fabulous autumn activity is apple picking. If you have picked them fresh, make sure to cut them up in the morning so they don’t turn brown before lunch. If stored properly, freshly picked apples will last up to two months in the refrigerator.
      Keep it cold
      Freeze a box of yogurt squeezers (my favorite is Stoneyfield Organic Strawberry), and include one in the lunch box. By the time lunch rolls around, the yogurt will be defrosted but still cold. And it will keep the other lunch items cold, too. You can find dozens of quick and easy kid-friendly recipes on my blog at www.mommachef.com. All use no more than six ingredients and are under six minutes of prep time.
      Momma Chef’s Cornflake Coated Chicken (makes 6 servings)
      6 boneless chicken breasts
      4 cups cornflakes
      2 large eggs
      2 tbsp. water
      1 tbsp. salt

      1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
      2. In a large bowl, mix together eggs and water. Set aside.
      3. In a large Ziploc bag, add the cornflakes and salt. Then crush the cornflakes.
      4. Dip each chicken breast in the egg/water mixture and put them in the Ziploc bag. Shake to coat all sides of the chicken.
      5. Arrange the chicken in a single layer on a baking sheet and bake for 40 minutes.
      Read more...
    • Tips for preparing your special needs child for back-to-school
      For most parents, back-to-school time means buying the kids a new backpack and shoes, and maybe taking them for a haircut. For parents of kids with special needs, however, going back-to-school can be much more stressful for both them and their children than just a shopping trip to
      the mall. Children who are not successful in school, either for emotional/behavioral or academic reasons, often feel happier and calmer over the summer break when they are not dealing with the demands of school. If this is your family’s situation, there are several things you can do to try to minimize the stress of back-to-school for you and your child.
      Review your child’s IEP
      Whether the IEP was drafted six months ago or just prior to summer break, it is helpful to refamiliarize yourself with the services and accommodations your child will be receiving in the upcoming school year. Check to make sure that the IEP still reflects your child’s needs or whether some aspects need to be modified due to changes over the past few months. Under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), an IEP meeting to review the IEP can be requested at any time during the school year. You do not need to wait until annual
      review time.

      Organize your child’s school records
      If you child has been in special education for more than a few years, chances are you have a lot of paperwork accumulated from the school and outside providers. Summer break is a great time to review your documentation and develop an organizational system. I use an accordian file for my own child, but many of my clients prefer a three-ring binder. Not unlike tax documents, we recommend that you maintain your child’s
      special education documents during the length of time they are in school. While a parent has a right to request a copy of their child’s educational records at any time under the Illinois School Student Records Act (ISSRA), it is still a good idea to maintain your own copy for comparison and easy access.
      Request a back-to-school IEP for the beginning of the year
      For both my own daughter and many of my clients, I frequently request that an IEP meeting be scheduled approximately 3-5 weeks
      into the school year to ensure that the services are being implemented smoothly and to review and tweak the IEP. For children undergoing a significant transition (e.g., to a new school or new placement), I would not hesitate to request a meeting to review that transition. Ideally, we
      recommend that this type of back-to-school meeting be included as a necessary accommodation in your child’s IEP, especially when experiencing a significant transition, but if that is not the case you can also simply contact your special education administrator and request it at the start of the school year.
      Schedule a special back-to-school meet-and-greet/tour for your child prior to the first day of school
      Many children with special needs need prior exposure to new experiences to help ease their anxiety. If this sounds like your child, we recommend reaching out the school to request a special meeting and/or tour with your child’s LBS and/or classroom teacher. This is especially important if s/he is undergoing a significant transition. However, for many kids, it is necessary even if they are just moving up a grade into a new classroom. Most Illinois school districts implement several days of institute training for school staff prior to the first day of school and it is simple for them to schedule time for your child to visit. As with the back-to school IEP meeting, it is recommended that you include this special meeting/tour in your child’s IEP accommodations in their IEP every year.
      Read more...
    • "Prioritize yourself" was one of the takeaway lessons of Michelle Obama's Chicago stop on her Becoming tour.
      I had the pleasure of joining thousands of other women to attend Michelle Obama's book launch event for her book, Becoming, on Nov. 13 at United Center. It was amazing! I was in awe of her story, her strength, and steadfastness to become the Michelle Obama so many of us have come to love and adore. No matter your political affiliation, you cannot deny the superpowers she displays as a daughter, wife, mom, friend and leader. A true boss! 
      Ok, so now that I have finished gushing about Michelle Obama (can you tell I admire her just a little bit?), there was so much that I took from listening to the over two-hour conversation between her and my other hero, Oprah Winfrey. I am sure every mom felt a little bit more confident in their walk leaving the event! I know that I walked away feeling reassured by my mission as a mompreneur to inspire and enable moms to be more intentional about their self-care.
      One of the things that Michelle Obama shared that evening was to "push yourself up on your priority list." Sounds easy enough but yet it is so challenging for moms to do. I mean, if we push ourselves up on our to-do list, what will need to get de-prioritized? Will it be our partners? Our children? Mommy chores? It will likely be something, but we as moms have to get to a place where we are ok with it. We have to feel confident in knowing that the benefits of prioritizing "us" will far outweigh the cost of not conquering the to-do list or temporarily de-prioritizing someone else. It will be there tomorrow.   
      I can talk to you about this until I am blue in the face. I can have your bestest girlfriends call you and tell you once a day to have some me-time. I can even ask your significant other tell you its ok to be selfish every once in a while to have a mommy break. But if you do not truly believe this yourself, it will be in vain. If you do not put mind over matter to make it happen it will not. In order to become the moms and, most importantly, the women we were destined to be, we must be more intentional about our self-care in 2019.  
      Here are three easy things you can do:
      1. Create a list of your favorite things to do. From working out to trying new restaurants to taking a walk along the lake, there are tons of different things you can do. 2. Once you make your list of favorite things, pick two things to do over the next two weeks. It can be as quick as 15 minutes or as long as a couple of hours. Write it down on the calendar. (Writing it down is important.)
      3. Share your intention with at least one person. This can be a fellow mom (and if it gets her on board to join you), your significant other, or a co-worker. Ask them to check with you a couple of days before the scheduled break to make sure you are on track for still taking it. 
      If you are successful with completing these tasks, “rinse and repeat” and try again next month. We not only owe it to Michelle Obama so that she has tangible proof that her story made an impact, but more importantly, we owe it to ourselves. I am ecstatic for 2019 and all of the awesome women we will continue to become as a result of being intentional about our self-care in 2019.  
      Read more...
    • Neighborhood Parents Network and the Chicago Sun-Times partnered to present a panel discussion on the state of education in Chicago. These were the overarching themes from the discussion.
      What's the state of education in Chicago, and what can be done to make sure every child gets access to the same opportunities? Those were the questions guiding Tuesday evening's panel discussion, Letters to the Editor Live: Chicago Education in Crisis, presented by the Chicago Sun-Times and Neighborhood Parents Network. 
      The panel—comprised of Sun-Times reporters and columnists Lauren FitzPatrick, Dan Mihalopoulos, Mark Brown and Mary Mitchell, as well as NPN's Amy Johnson and Tiffany Norwood, both CPS moms—fielded tough questions from moderator Jim Kirk, editor/publisher of the Sun-Times, and the audience of parents and community members. 
      The result? Some salient points and overarching themes are outlined below, but one thing that can't be emphasized enough is that reporters like those on last night's panel want to hear about what's important to you and what you think readers should know about. So if there's something about Chicago education that you think is underreported, don't shout into a vacuum: Contact these reporters! 
      Okay, off the journalism soapbox (John Oliver does a much better job anyway) and onto some of the issues covered during the panel discussion:
      Parents and community members are frustrated with CPS and Chicago Board of Education. No surprises there. People are upset about the lack of transparency when it comes to Board of Education decisions and CPS's apparent lack of a strategic plan to improve education in Chicago.
      An elected school board may not be a horrible idea. Reporter Lauren FitzPatrick cited her investigation of Board of Education votes over the years and few, if any, cast dissenting votes on any proposal. And while an elected school board would likely invite patronage, steep campaign spending and every other issue that can come with running for elected office in Chicago, coud it really be worse than what we have now? "It's worth a try," columnist Mark Brown says.
      Impoverished and minority students need more CPS support. Columnist Mary Mitchell said 82% of CPS students live in poverty, and CPS has failed at finding a way to create environments that are nurturing to poor kids. 
      But there is good CPS news. One audience member, a CPS mom, noted that CPS 4th graders lead the nation in growth in math scores (8th graders also have shown nation-leading growth in math scores). The graduation rate is growing (though not as quickly as CPS originally stated). And there are some parents doing great work to make CPS schools better. FitzPatrick mentioned the Logan Square Neighborhood Association's Parent Mentor Program, which recruits parent volunteers to assist teachers and work one-on-one with students—after 100 volunteer hours, they get a stipend.
      Stay tuned for more NPN education programming and discussions. In the meantime, if you're searching for the right school—public or private—for your child, don't miss our upcoming school fairs. 
      Read more...
    • A Q&A with Linda Kaiser from Parents for Window Blind Safety on how to protect your child.
      At the beginning of October, IKEA announced that it will only carry blinds with no cords or inaccessible cords in all of its global stores by January 2016. Kids In Danger (KID) spoke to Linda Kaiser from Parents for Window Blind Safety to find out what this change means in terms of ongoing safety and what parents can do to keep their kids safe with regards to window blinds.    What makes this move a big win for window blind safety? This sets the tone for other retailers to join in and start going cordless. Our hope is that all retailers go cordless. This is a huge statement made by retailers alerting the public on how dangerous these cords can be to kids. It’s also important to note that just one single accessible cord can kill a child. Many products consumers think are safe are not safe at all.    What about window blinds poses a hazard to kids? It’s a hazard that is in plain sight, and you don’t even think it could kill a child. Single pull cord blinds look so safe, but they can be wrapped around the necks of children in seconds, which causes loss of consciousness. Kids can’t call for help. They are especially dangerous when you think about how kids play– they use the cords to wrap around their neck for dramatic play (as a pretend necklace, to imitate Rapunzel from Tangled, when acting as superheros). Just think about how many movies you see for kids where someone is swinging from something.   What other steps have been taken to prevent children from being harmed by window blinds? Sadly, not much. We’re still waiting for the CPSC to move forward on our petition regarding inaccessible cords on window blinds for US windows. Unfortunately, the hazard just doesn’t go away with retailers going cordless in stores, as products with hazardous accessible cords can still be purchased online. Custom products have not been dealt with, and until manufactures decide that the lives of children are worth it, we see a desperate need for mandatory rulemaking.   On the positive side, in the past 10 years Parents for Window Blind Safety has been testing window covering products and placing our Seal of Approval on products that pass our first class safety criteria. We have recently united with third party labs to further broaden our testing procedures. This Seal of Approval program is set out to eliminate the strangulation hazards that corded window coverings may present and to ensure consumers can make the most appropriate buying decisions.    How can parents keep their children safe with regards to window blinds? The first step is to know that one single accessible cord can hurt a child. Stop trusting in devices that have failed to keep kids safe.   If you know that, then you can make the effort to not have window-covering products with pull cords in your home. It’s also important to realize that kids can access cords that are “tied up out of reach,” as oftentimes all they have to do is stand on the windowsill.     There are many affordable cordless products available on the market today. The good news is that many can be purchased for around $20 for standard size windows. Temporary shades can be purchased for a few dollars and placed in homes until the consumers decide what type of window covering best suits their needs.   For more information about window blind safety, visit Parents for Window Blind Safety’s website or check out their video, In An Instant. For more information on product safety, go to Kids In Danger and follow us on Facebook.
       
      Read more...
    • I'm teaching my small children (3 and 8 months) four languages: Mandarin, English, Spanish and Romanian. Here's why, and how.
      Recently I was in NYC for work, and as I was walking through the city it became clear English is not the only dominating language. You could hear Chinese and Brazilian Portuguese spoken at shops, and chattering among street vendors in Hindi and Arabic. This is definitely a phenomenon in the United States of America—a country of immigrants. In addition, when I look around, there are many kids nowadays from cross-racial families, like mine. Looking exotic is fun, and being able to comprehend and speak multiple languages is a bonus.
      In the past generations of immigrants, people abandoned their native tongue or didn't encourage their kids to speak it because the common desire was to learn and to only speak English so they could immerse themselves into the new country quickly. That notion has changed completely in the modern parenting, especially for those whose families have diverse ethnic backgrounds. Linguistics and early childhood education shows a child can learn a seocnd language three times faster before age 7, and pretty much slows down (or becomes difficult) after age 14, compared to an adult.
      Many of my friends lament that their kids can't speak their ethnic language. The moment their kids started elementary school, they refused to speak other language besides English, unless other immersion learning environments were provided. Otherwise, you are pretty much stuck with learning a language in school, which will never encourage fluency. Which is a pity.
      Therefore, my takeaways are: 1) The golden learning window is small, better optimize than regret later; 2) Learning a second language stimulates the brain in a different way. (Even if simultaneous translation glasses become available for our kids' generation, the cultural aspect of learning a language will never be replaced by robots!)
      The following is the language program I've developed for my almost 3-year-old and 8-month-old:
      English: They will master on their own by living in an English-speaking country. At home, we only focus on reading books (yes, paper ones) every day for 20-40 minutes, by me, by Daddy, or any guests visiting when I have a chance to outsource the task.
      Mandarin Chinese: We have some advantages on this front, and I am leveraging them as much as possible: a Chinese nanny (who speaks no English); a Taiwanese educational program "Ciao Hu" shipped by my parents from Taiwan every quarter with seasonal toys and a DVD; Mandarin language class every Saturday at Language Stars; one-month winter vacation in Taiwan with my parents once both kids are potty-trained (escaping unbearably cold Chicago is a bonus).
      Romanian: We also have some advantages here (my husband is Romanian), but due to Daddy's work and travel schedule, we are still trying to improve the learning opportunity: part-time Romanian nanny (who speaks no English); Dino Lingo apps for games, books and video; spending the summer at their grandparents' Transylvania orchard country house, where they'll learn how to milk a cow and how to make Romanian crepes from scratch.
      Spanish: Look, 1 out of 4 people in the U.S. speak Spanish, so why not? We are doing Spanish circle time at preschool, Urban Child Academy and Language Stars every Sat morning.
      So, how do my kids do? My 8-month-old takes all in, no complaining. And my almost 3-year-old is totally confused between Spanish and Romanian when she is asked to count to 20 (a natural occurrence, according to linguists). However, she is able to translate for our Chinese nanny to place a food order at Navy Pier during their weekly Children's Museum excursion.
      The fact is my own four-language journey (Mandarin, English, Japanese and French) started after 7, which is clearly too late, so I am not good at any of them. However, I'm starting to feel it could be mission possible for my kids. Stay tuned.
      Read more...
    • Dr. Thomas Phelan of 1-2-3 Magic offers parenting advice for adjusting parents' attitudes, which will change children's attitudes as well.
      Anyone who is a parent knows that the job is tough. Really tough. If we moms and dads were really honest with ourselves, we'd have to admit that we had almost no idea what we were getting into when we brought that first baby home.
      The old saying about kids not coming with a training manual is true. And the problem of "What do I do with this kid?" is intensified for parents in our contemporary rush-rush, worry-worry world. The problem is that when parents don't quite know what they're doing and they're too busy to find out, they tend to shoot from the hip. Shooting from the hip can lead to two opposite, out-of-control parenting styles, neither of which is good for children. Let's call these two styles "Underdog" parenting and "Big Dog" parenting.
      The Underdog parent is a pushover. The children run the house and mom and dad tend to take a back seat. Where Big Dog parents are involved, however, it's the adults who intimidate and it's the kids who stay out of the way. Big Dog parents are T-Rexes in disguise.
      Underdog parents' behavior with their children is motivated primarily by anxiety and guilt. "Don't want to do anything to offend the children" and "If the kids are mad at me I must have done something wrong" are the overriding thoughts. Big Dog parents' behavior with their children, on the other hand, is dominated primarily by irritation and anger. "Because I said so!" and "Do what I tell you or else!" are the predominant themes.
      Underdog parents whimper, while Big Dog parents bite. Underdoggers plead with their kids like this: "Come on now, honey, don't you think it's time for bed? Why can't you just do this one little thing for me?" Translation (in other words, what does the youngster really hear?): "Even though you're my child, you're too strong and powerful for me. I haven't the slightest idea how to control you other than begging." Whimpering tells the children that they—the kids—are really running the show and that their parent is basically weak and helpless.
      Big Dog parents bite. They can bite emotionally as well as physically. Here's an emotional "sound bite": "What the hell's the matter with you!? You better start listening to me or else! How many times do I have to tell you?" Translation (in other words, what does the youngster really hear?): "You're no good, kid, and you never will be. If it weren't for me, you'd be in even more hot water." The Big Dog parent may throw in a spanking after the lecture to make sure the point is driven home. Big Dog parents bite.
      Not surprisingly, these two opposite forms of out-of-control parenting produce two different results. Kids from Underdog parents tend to become adults with a robust sense of entitlement. They think the world owes them a living and they try to push other people around. When life doesn't treat them like they think it should (which is inevitable), they blame everyone else for their misery.
      Our children from the T-Rex moms and dads, though, will become adults with a deep sense of insecurity and unworthiness. They'll think everyone else is better than they are and they'll tend to withdraw. Even if they do succeed at certain things, they won't be able to give themselves credit for what they've done. 
      How can we interrupt this tragic cycle? Well, there is a book with an odd title, called 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12. In this book, parents will understand that their parenting job consists of three things: 1) controlling obnoxious behavior, 2) encouraging good behavior and 3) strengthening relationships with the children. And yes, specific, effective, tried-and-true and fairly simple strategies are provided in 1-2-3 Magic for accomplishing these three parenting tasks. The program is evidence-based—it works.
      But something stands between Underdog parents and their ability to adopt new strategies like 1-2-3 Magic. The same thing, in different form, stands in the way of the Big Doggers.
      It's their attitude. It's their view of parenting itself. Both of these kinds of impulsive, out-of-control parents need a major attitude adjustment before they can learn to become decent parents. Yes, useful advice for managing children is out there, but the Underdog folks and the Big Dog folks have to learn how to think differently before they can use these helpful suggestions.
      The attitude adjustments required here fall into three main categories: 1) appreciating the "rights" of family members, 2) understanding the effects of different parenting styles, and 3) accepting the need to switch to deliberate, thoughtful parenting strategies. Let's look at each of these.
      Rights. Underdog moms and dads need to understand that not only do they have a right to be a parent, but it is in everyone's best interests if they—the adults—do set limits. Kids not liking limits is normal. It is not a tragedy and it is not due to parental error. Big Doggers, on the other hand, need to appreciate that their children have rights. The kids have a right not to fear physical or emotional abuse from their own parents. Big Doggers need to consider the possibility that a home should not always revolve around the whims of the largest mongrel in the joint Effects of parenting style. Underdoggers need to realize that repeated parental whimpering creates Entitled Super Brats. Big Doggers need to realize that repeated biting eliminates kids' sense of self-worth. Deliberate parenting. Both types of parents, Big Dog and Underdog, need to accept the necessity of switching from an automatic/impulsive to a more deliberate/thoughtful approach to parenting. It's not that hard. "Parenting" primarily out of irritation and anger is not really parenting. Neither is "parenting" primarily out of anxiety or guilt. Both Big Doggers and Underdoggers need to see that simply engaging in emotional self-indulgence is bad for everyone in the family—including themselves. Good parenting advice is already out there. 1-2-3 Magic offers a ton of good suggestions. But for many moms and dads, the main thing that stands in the way of their becoming decent parents is a straightforward—though not easy—attitude adjustment.
      Read more...
    • Chicago families can get some nice tax breaks if they know what's available to them. Check out how you can save with a child tax credit, dependent exemptions and more.
      While it may feel like children require an outpouring of funds, here are several child-related tax breaks that may allow you to save some on your taxes. 
       
      1. Dependent exemption: You are entitled to a personal exemption for each person claimed on your return. For 2017 this means you reduce your taxable income by $4,050 per exemption on your federal return and $2,175 per exemption on your Illinois return. The savings are these amounts times your tax rates. Note that the exemption phases out for higher-income taxpayers on the federal return. For married taxpayers, the phase out starts at $313,800 and is completely phased out at $436,300.
       
      2. The child tax credit: You may be able to reduce your federal income tax by up to $1,000 for each qualifying child under the age of 17. A qualifying child for this credit is someone who meets the qualifying criteria of six tests: age, relationship, support, dependent, citizenship and residence.  
       
      The credit is gradually reduced as a taxpayer's income increases. The phase out begins at the following thresholds and is reduced by $50 for each $1,000 of income over the threshold.
      $55,000 for married couples filing separately $75,000 for single, head of household and qualifying widow(er) filers $110,000 for married couples filing jointly  
      3. The child and dependent care credit: If all parents on the return have earned income you can claim a 20–35% credit (based on income) on up to $3,000 of expenses paid for one qualifying person, or up to $6,000 of expenses paid for two or more qualifying persons. Qualifying persons are children under 13. Qualified expenses include day care, nannies, preschool, day camp and aftercare. The name, address and social security number or EIN of the provider are required to claim this credit.
       
      4. The Illinois education credit: You can claim a credit for 25% of your K-12 student’s qualified expenses in excess of $250 up to a maximum of $500 per return. Qualified expenses include tuition, book fees and lab fees paid directly to the school.
       
      5. The IL tax deduction for 529 contributions: Illinois allows a deduction of up to $20,000 for married taxpayers ($10,000 for single taxpayers) contributions to Illinois 529 plans (BrightStart, Bright Directions or Illinois College!). You will save 3.75% (the Illinois tax rate) on whatever you contribute.
       
      As each taxpayer’s situation is unique, please consult with your tax advisor to determine which of these savings opportunities you can utilize.
       
      Lisa Niser is a Chicago mom who has been helping families with their taxes and financial planning for over 20 years. She helps many NPN members with their nanny tax needs as well. Visit www.lisaniser.com to learn more about her practice.
      Read more...
    • Follow these tips to get your whole family sleeping more soundly.
      Does bedtime feel like a battle in your house? Do you end up giving in to the demand for more water, another story or other excuses your child comes up with to stay up later? Are you trying to transition your child to sleeping in her own bed and not having success? Follow these 8 tips to get your whole family sleeping more soundly.
      1. Routine: Make the transition to bedtime smooth and predictable by creating a consistent routine. Include nighttime rituals that are calming and comforting, turning off electronics and cutting down on active play at least an hour before bed. If activities such as dressing in pajamas or brushing teeth are stressful for your child, finish them earlier so it’s not part of the relaxing routine.  
      2. Select the proper bedtime: Your child should be tired when it is bedtime. If you are unsure what bedtime is right for your child, start to keep a sleep journal, tracking what time they fall asleep and what time they wake up in the morning. The goal is to help your child get the right amount of sleep on a reliable schedule. 
      3. Sleep object: A sleep object can be soothing and comforting for a child who wakes in the night and needs help soothing himself back to sleep. Having an object that is only accessible during bedtime helps your child associate the object with sleep. An option is the OK To Wake! Owl. This cuddly owl tells your child with a soft voice and visual cue whether it is okay to get up or if they need to go back to bed.   
      4. Social story: Utilize a social story to teach your child bedtime skills. A social story sounds like this: My name is James; I am learning to sleep in my own bed. If I wake up at night I can take big breaths and close my eyes to fall asleep. I can sing a quiet song, or cuddle with my owl. 
      5. Staying in bed: When your child wakes in the night, calmly guide your child back into her bed using as few words as possible. Set your child up for success by being clear with your expectations long before bedtime. Have a conversation to define when she is allowed in your bed, such as when she is sick or has a scary dream. Consistency is important for breaking this habit.
      6. Incentives: Incentives are a great way to communicate to your child that you see his efforts and are proud of their progress. Sticker charts can be effective in helping track progress. For example, every night your child stays in bed he gets a sticker. After seven stickers, he receives a special reward such as his favorite breakfast. If your child is younger than eight, consider having smaller immediate rewards along the way.  
      7. Preparation: Before you change your child’s routine, start talking about it a few days in advance in a positive way, mark it on the calendar, have your child pick out special sheets, make a special pillow and make a social story to walk her through the upcoming change.
      Read more...
    • The talents parents develop in order to keep their kids sane and happy should be rewarded with Olympic medals. Here are 4 parenting feats that should be Olympic sports.
      Photo credit: Vincent Angler/Flickr   Olympic fever is alive and well in our house. The excitement of close finishes, the talented and determined athletes, the national pride..what isn’t there to love? And what I find even more inspiring is that many of these athletes are parents, which means that while training for the Olympic Games, they are also participating in the Parenting Games.   Which got me thinking about what types of “sports” there should be in the Parenting Games…skills and accomplishments that make you feel like you have mastered at least some part of parenting. So tell me, have you gone for the gold in any of these activities?   The Floorboard Walk As any parent knows, it is a sign of deft expertise to be able to walk through your home silently and avoid all of those floorboard creaks, whether with a sleeping child in your arms or just after you tucked someone in and are hoping to race to your adult beverage and remote control before your little one wakes up.   This vital parenting ability is also related to stepping on LEGO without screaming every expletive imaginable and walking past musical toys without setting them off (not only waking up everyone in the house, but also freaking yourself out a bit….because those toys are WAY creepy once night time settles in).   The Diaper Challenge We have been surprisingly lucky to have kids who enjoy eating at local kid-friendly restaurants and behave rather well through the course of a meal, but there is always an element of going out to eat that truly puts our parenting skills to the test: changing a diaper when there isn’t a diaper changing table.   Figuring out how to change your wiggly little one and keeping him or her from touching all of the nasty surfaces in a bathroom definitely proves that parents (especially those awesome dads out there!) earn the beer waiting for them back at the table.   The Target Tantrum Side-Step Target is my happy place, but not so much when I am there with my kids. Why? Because they too fall under Target’s spell and want EVERYTHING! And when Mommy says no, guess what happens? Tantrums.   Tantrums so bad that their faces get almost as red as the cart they are strapped inside. So every time a parent manages to either ride out the tantrum or head out the door while wrangling wailing kiddos, she should get bronze, silver AND gold medals.   The Sleeping Child Transfer You know what’s awesome? When your kiddo conks out in the car and you can drive in peace (and maybe even hit up the Starbucks drive-thru). You know what’s not awesome? When your child screams and fights being in the car seat only to fall asleep five minutes from the house. But when you are able to somehow maneuver your child from the car seat, through the house, over to his bedroom without waking him, you have officially mastered parenting. Tuck yourself in as well, and enjoy a hard-earned nap.   What parenting task do you think should be an Olympic sport?

      Amanda Simkin, a lifelong Chicagoan, created her blog (queenofthelandoftwigsnberries.com) to share how she celebrates motherhood in Chicago. She offers “insider’s guides” for both well-known and off-the-beaten-path family-friendly gems. Her fans include Red Tricycle Chicago and Chicago Parent Magazine.
           
      Read more...
    • Kids can get Seasonal Affective Disorder, too. How to detect it and how to help your child through it.
      As the lack of sunshine becomes a part of our daily lives, a certain gloom comes over many young people and is often assumed to be something ranging from “winter blues” to a depressive disorder called seasonal affective disorder (SAD).
      According to kidhealth.org, “SAD is a form of depression that follows a seasonal pattern; SAD appears and disappears around the same times each year. People with SAD usually have symptoms of depression as winter approaches and daylight hours become shorter.” Once spring arrives and the days become longer again, they feel relief from their symptoms and a return to their normal mood and level of energy.
      Surprisingly, there are people who experience SAD in reverse (apparently, summer is not an exciting time for everyone). The symptoms of SAD are a lot like depression, but the fact that SAD symptoms occur only for a few months each winter (for at least two years in a row) distinguishes it from other forms of depression. You may assume your child has “winter blues”—a common emotion for some Chicagoans this time of the year. But the problems caused by SAD, such as lower grades or less energy for socializing with friends, can affect their self-esteem and leave them feeling disappointed, isolated, and lonely, especially if they don’t realize what’s causing the changes in energy, mood, and motivation.
      It is imperative that as parents and caregivers, you are checking in with your child in order to provide enough examples to share with your pediatrician. If your child is diagnosed with SAD, here are a few tips that parents can do:
      Participate in your child’s treatment. Ask the doctor how you can best assist your child in managing their moods.
      Find quality time to build a sense of connection with your child. Alienation exacerbates SAD symptoms. Positive human connection increases their energy level.
      Assist with homework. Children with SAD may worry that they’re incapable of doing the schoolwork.Reassure them that your assistance is to be seen as support, not a handicap. You may also want to talk to the teachers and ask for extensions on certain assignments until things improve with treatment.
      Stick to a sleep routine. Encourage your child to maintain a regular bedtime every day to reap the mental health benefits of daylight hours.
      Though we can’t bring the sun down to warm and light up our winter days, we can make the best of the season by planning ahead on undesirable days. Do your research and get outside for some fresh air, plan a playdate, or have an indoor beach party with summer jams playing in the background!
      Lastly, to make those grey days more bearable, count down every week with a special event such as an outing to an exhibit, or to your favorite restaurant. Having something to look forward to will only help to distract not only your child, but everyone enduring the notorious Chicago winter.
      Read more...
About us
Membership
Support us
facebook twitter instagram
info@npnparents.org

Privacy Policy Membership Terms

© 2024 Neighborhood Parents Network of Chicago

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Thank you for visiting our site. Browsing this site is an acceptance of our We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. and Terms of Use.